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God Given Solace by Pari



The funeral service had been ‘short’ and ‘sweet’, per Fran Morgan’s request, and it had been a grave side ceremony, which had not surprised anyone who really knew the Morgan family. Derek had explained it when Garcia had asked why there would be no church ceremony he told her that they had all lost their faith and stopped attending church services after his father was killed. He went on to tell her that he had only found his faith again in recent years and that he had only ‘willingly’ stepped foot in a church once since his father’s funeral, and that was the night she had been shot. The irony of that still amazed him, that after so many years of not believing and even cursing God, the one night he decided to speak with God again, to ask for God’s forgiveness and seek his love was during the exact moment his babygirl was fighting for her life.


“You restored my faith in God Babygirl,” He had told her and Garcia could only smile and bow her head coyly at his words.


Throughout the day Garcia had stuck close to Morgan’s side, not that he had given her much of a choice; he kept a firm grip on her hand and had not released her since they had left out that morning heading to the cemetery. Garcia had not protested because she didn’t mind, she knew Morgan needed her support and she would be there to give him as much as he needed. So when there were moments during the ceremony that would cause Morgan to tighten his grip on her hand to the point of pain, she would just inwardly wince or bite the inside of her cheek and bear it.


So he clutched her hand even as he stood above his mother’s casket to say his farewells, and he clutched her hand as he stood with his sisters while their guests lined up and walked by them to offer their condolences. Garcia had felt out of place especially when the guests started giving their condolences to her as well, but when she had stepped back to move away, Morgan tightened his grip and stilled her. Now they stood in his mother’s living room which was filled with the funeral guests and neighborhood friends who had stopped by to say ‘sorry for your loss’ and to grab some of the mountains of food, and Garcia’s right hand was still housed inside of Morgan’s strong grip, while her free hand held a plate of food that his sister Sarah had given her.


“Did you want to try and eat something?” She asked in a hushed tone. “You didn’t eat anything last night or this morning, you need to put something on your stomach before you pass out.” Morgan only graced her with a sad and tired smile in reply and she knew that meant ‘No I don’t ‘want’ to eat but I will for you’, and so she smiled back and then realized their dilemma. “You’re gonna have to let go,” She said as she held up their entwined hands. “Unless you want me to feed you, in which case…you’re still gonna have to let go.” Her smile widened. “I promise I’ll give it right back when you’re finished.” She teased, speaking to him like he was a child, with a slight pout on her mouth, and he laughed out loud at her, causing others to glance at them. Garcia looked mortified as she threw apologetic eyes at Desirée and Sarah who stood nearby, but they both smiled in response, they both were just happy to see their brother in an enlightened mood.


“All right sweetness, what’s on that plate?” Morgan asked as he continued to chuckle. Garcia held up the plate so he could inspect the contents. “Mmmm,” He grasped the fork that lay on the plate with his free hand and began picking over the food; picking up a bit from each helping and nibbling on his. Garcia watched him with amusement. Not overlooking the fact that he had managed to appease her without relinquishing her hand.


“Well you do plan on giving me back my hand someday right, I mean I do need both to…you know…do my job.” She teased him more.


“Please we both know you can do your job and then some with one hand tied behind your back,” Morgan stated what he thought was the truth and then lifted their jointed hands to his mouth, where he kissed the back on her hand. “Thank you Penelope for being here with me.”


“Derek, there’s no place in the entire Universe that I’d rather be. Although when I made that offer to give you a hand, I didn’t mean it ‘literally’.” She smiled and again he laughed and kissed the back of her hand.

[Later that night]


It had been just thirty minutes since the last of the guests had dwindled out, and Desirée and Sarah had taken their families home. They had intended to stay and help clean up and start packing their mother’s things up, but Morgan had insisted that he and Garcia could clean and that the rest would keep until tomorrow. Together Morgan and Garcia had completely cleaned up save for a few dirty dishes that they stood at the kitchen sink cleaning; Garcia was washing them and Morgan did the drying. When they were finished they both collapsed onto the sofa. Garcia kicked off her heels with a groan, and Morgan reached down and grasped her feet, then he settled back and rested her feet atop his lap. Just as Garcia was about to protest, he began rubbing her arches and the balls of her feet and her words morphed into moans.


“Oh my God, that feels sooo good.” She said as she let her head fall back and her eyes close for a moment. Morgan smirked as he kept his eyes focused on her feet and his task. When her eyes opened again they fell on to a framed picture displaying a young Morgan that was poised on the oak table behind the sofa. “Is this you?” She asked as she giggled and reached out to grasp the picture. “Awwww I knew you were always a heart breaker, look at you.” She cooed and he threw her a wink and a smile in reply. “And you are rocking that jheri curl baby.”


“Hey…hey that was all natural young lady,” Morgan defended as he tickled at the bottom of her feet, causing her to laugh out and kick her feet a bit.


“Oh now my interest is peaked, I need to see more pictures of you as a baby, so I’ll have a general idea of how our future babies will look.” She joked. “So give it up, where are all those photo albums?” Morgan stood and gently placed her feet onto the sofa as he walked to the nearby coat closet.


“If you think you’re gonna find some bad pics of me that you can blackmail me with you can forget about it.” Morgan announced with his back to her and he head buried in the closet where he was rummaging through the top shelf for the photo albums.


“Oh, honey I know that you have never and could never take a ‘bad’ pic. Now stop stalling and gimme the photos.”


“I’m looking woman, but they must have been moved. Hey mom where…” His words instantly froze in his throat and the realization of the past few days all flooded in on him suddenly, and made him drop to his knees under the weight of his despair. “Uhhhhnnaaahhh,” Morgan cried out in the most mournful sound Garcia had ever heard from him, and she swiftly moved to him.


“Hey it’s ok, shhhh,” She spoke softly as she stood at his back unsure of what she should do, what he wanted and what he needed. She wanted to wrap him up in her arms, but she didn’t know how he would react to that. So she placed a supporting hand onto his back as she moved to kneel at his side. When she got within his reach his hand shot out and tugged her closer, she stumbled a bit trying to remain on her feet, as he enclosed her fully in his arms and buried his face against her midsection.


“She’s gone, my mom’s gone.” He wailed and seeing Morgan in such a distraught state made Garcia’s own tears began to fall. She embraced him tightly and kissed the top of his head as she attempted to console him.


“I know baby and I’m so sorry. I wish I could take the pain away or lie to you and tell you it’ll go away someday…but it doesn’t, not really…I still miss my mom and my dad every single day and it still hurt not having them here with me.” She continued speaking in a low tone and her voice and words seem to calm him, as his groans of despair quieted. “But there will come a time when you won’t cry when you think about your mom, you’ll only smile from the happy memories, I promise.” She tried to stand more upright so she could pull him up and move him to the couch but Morgan’s pull was too strong and she fell against him, he kept his hold on her and guided her body down his own until she was kneeling right in front of him. “What do I do, what do you need?” She asked genuinely seeking his guidance on how to make him feel better. His brow bunched and he looked as if he was actually giving it some thought, and then he did the one thing Garcia never expected. He moved in and captured her mouth with his in a wet kiss. She couldn’t tell if her eyes drifting shut or the moan that escaped her lips were something instinctual or due to the jolt of pleasure that suddenly filled her. After a few seconds of heated kisses they broke apart for air. “Morgan, we shouldn’t do this, you don’t want…”


“Please Penelope, I need this, I need you…please,” He begged as his hands released her body and grasped her face and held her as he recaptured her lips. “I just want to forget for a little while,” Morgan spoke between kisses. “Please help me forget.” Garcia was torn, her mind in turmoil. Was she willing to jeopardize a 3 year ‘solid’ relationship with Kevin to help the only ‘true’ best friend she’d ever had? Morgan seemed to sense her dilemma and pulled back and pressed his forehead against hers as he stared intensely into her eyes. “This could be something just between you and me, just this one time…no one else has to know. Please,” He kissed her again softly. “Please babygirl.” This kiss held an urgency that took Garcia’s breath away and she melted into his touch and let her body go slack up against his. Morgan took her more relaxed state as affirmation and quickly pushed his weight against her body, forcing her to lie back prone upon the hardwood floor.


They both knew that this was not about romance or love, even though they did truly love and respect each other, but no this was about raw, primal need. So when Morgan’s hands roughly yanked open the front of Garcia’s black blouse, which exposed her milky white, silk-covered breasts and sent black buttons scattering across the floor, she hadn’t been shocked. Nor was she shocked when he moved his hand down and hiked up her black skirt and pulled at her matching silk panties until he tore them from her body. It wasn’t until Morgan settled his weight atop her, pinned her hands above her head, and thrust his engorged member into her hot core did Garcia arch her body up off the floor and cried out in surprise and pain at the sudden intrusion, while she struggled to catch her breath. Morgan’s movements were manic, like a man crazed, he let out a strangled roar with each thrust. He seemed unconcern about her comfort or that he was bruising her back against the floor. She knew that if she had complained he would have stopped but she also knew that he seemed to need this more than anything, and she honestly feared what he would do in substitution if she denied him.


The familiar waves of ecstasy fluttered in the pit of her stomach and fanned out over her entire body, a feeling that was usually soon followed but an orgasm. The build-up had only taken a fraction of the time it usually did, when she and Kevin made love, so she wasn’t prepared when it assaulted her and left her clawing at Morgan’s back as she screamed and then gasped for air. Morgan’s own climax struck about a second after hers, and he knotted a section of her red hair in one of his hands as the other remained latched onto her wrists. He kissed her sloppily as he croaked out his release and then buried his face in the nook of her neck as his hip sporadically gyrated pumping out his cum to coat her walls. When he was completely spent, he released her and rolled away from her body to lie on his back on the floor beside her. They both lay there panting, staring at the ceiling waiting for their bodies and breathing to calm. Garcia was the first to recollect herself and slowly began to sit up and fix her torn blouse upon her body.


“Dibbs on the first shower,” She said lightheartedly and patted his clothed thigh, in an attempt to stifle the tension she could feel trying to creep its way into the room. “Then it’s beddy-bye time, and you should do the same. We have a lot to do tomorrow before our flight home.” Morgan could only nod his head, but his mind was still reeling from what had just occurred between them. He appreciated that Garcia was apparently trying to make him feel at ease with it, acting as if it wasn’t a big thing, just something casual, but he was having a hard time seeing it that way. Guilt was encroaching upon him and his hand shot out and grasped her hand just as she began to stand up.


“Penelope,” He called out softly to her and she turned her head towards him but didn’t look at him, her red tresses obscured her face a bit.


“I enjoyed it, did you?” She asked in a very hushed tone.


“Yes, very much,” He answered in a near whisper.


“Then don’t analyze it, Derek,” She said and then moved from his grasp, stood, and headed up the stairs, snatching up her tattered panties on the way. Derek remained on the floor for a moment longer, banging his head and silently cursing his own stupidity, and prayed that Garcia was truly at ease with their intimate encounter as she ‘seemed’ to be and to chalk this up as just one of those things. More than anything he hoped it didn’t affect their friendship or change their relationship, but he realized how fruitless that was when he was fighting down the urge to run up the stair after her to join her in her shower and then take her again in his bed.


[The next day]



They had decided to stop at the cemetery before they headed to the airport since they had an hour before their flight left. They had finished packing up Fran’s belongings before noon, with the help of Morgan’s sisters and it had been decided amongst the siblings that Sarah and her two sons would live in the house they all own equally. Desirée and her husband owned their own home in Chicago and Derek owned 4 properties three in the DC area and the one he resided in near Quantico, but Sarah was still renting, and since she was the only one of them with children it just made the most sense.


Most of the night and all during the day Morgan’s mind would replay the events of the previous night, even though he and Garcia carried on with their usual flirty banter and to the outside world no one would ever suspect what had transpired between them. Garcia had made it clear last night that she didn’t want to discuss it when Morgan had come to her room just as she was about to go to bed. She had seen the desire that shone in his eyes and a part of her couldn’t help but revel in the fact that she had invoked that emotion within him and itched to give into him again, but her rational side told her that it had been a moment of weakness, one glorious and magnificent moment that would be forever branded into her mind and her senses, but it was a moment that she knew they could never share again so long as she was in a relationship with Kevin. When she told this to Morgan he had neither professed his undying love for her nor demanded that she end things with Kevin to be with him. He had simply nodded his head and said, ‘OK’ and so as far as she was concerned that had settled the matter and she bid him goodnight. They both spent the remainder of the night tossing and turning in bed quietly reminiscing until they could no longer elude the sandman.


It took them a few minutes to find the right spot and the fact that Morgan’s steps seemed to slow the closer they got, but finally they found the right plot. He and Garcia stood staring down at the small stone plaque that lay face up on the ground. It was small and simple and had been picked out by Fran, and when Morgan had insisted on paying for something bigger, the funeral organizer handed him an envelope that had his name on it, written by his mother. Morgan had opened the envelope and taken out the single piece of paper to read it. It was just a couple of sentences also in his mother’s handwriting that read, ‘This is what ‘I’ want Derek, so put your wallet away and respect your mother’s wishes. Don’t make me have to come back and whoop you.’ He laughed at the words even as fresh tears spilled from his eyes. So the small plaque remained. Morgan stood staring down at his mother’s name etched in the stone as Garcia cautiously watched him out the corner of her eyes. They both wore dark sunglasses but they couldn’t disguise the tears that ran down both their cheeks.


“I miss her so much,” Morgan spoke out as he instinctually reached out and grabbed Garcia’s hand.


“And you always will,” She said with a heavy sigh as she lightly squeezed his hand and thought of her own mother.


“Thank you, for coming with me, for being here with me…for me.” He said as he turned to look directly at her, she could feel his eyes on her but she kept her eyes on the tombstone as she smiled at him.


“That’s what best friends are for, and you would have done the same for me.” He nodded. “We should get going it’s probably gonna take 30 minutes to get to the airport if traffic isn’t too bad.” Again Morgan nodded his head and then bent down and placed the roses he had brought, just underneath the headstone, and then righted himself.



“Bye mom, I’ll see you on my next visit home,” Morgan spoke lowly and then he lifted Garcia’s hand to his lips and kissed the back of her hand. She shivered slightly from the sensation of his hot breath on her skin, but she refused to let her thoughts drift ‘there’, not ever again she said to herself. He tugged her through the cemetery back to the waiting cab, as both of them wondered how life back ‘home’ would be, and if they could really keep up their ‘nothing happened’ façade.
Endnotes: So that’s the end, I know it may seem like I’ve left you hanging, but it felt like the right place to end this particular story. I know you might be wondering if I plan on writing a sequel, well the answer to that would be yes. So, go read - The Consequences
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